Social Symphony

Last weekend I returned to play in the local symphony for the Holiday (CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS) concert.  I hadn't performed with the group since the summer because since I started my new job, I've had conflicts with every concert and/or dress rehearsal until now.  I didn't realize how much I missed it until I showed up at the first rehearsal and all my colleagues greeted me with surprised, genuine smiles and comments like, "You're back!" and "Well look what the cat dragged in..." and "We missed you!" and "I almost didn't recognize you with your hair down!"  I call my fellow musicians "colleagues" not "friends" because, well, they're not my friends, but they greeted me like the Prodigal's Son.  They made me feel like family and I interacted with them as if we had recently met for lunch and had long, meaningful conversations. We caught each other up on our lives during each 15 minute rehearsal break with quick sentences centered around jobs, family, and, well, that's it.  Each conversation took approximately 30 seconds.  It was weird though because each interaction with my musician colleagues wasn't forced or uncomfortable; I didn't feel the need to invent an exit strategy from the conversation ("OMG, is that Josh Bell?") and I didn't have to talk about the rehearsal ("So he is taking that blahblah piece is so fast! I'm pretty much faking, like, half the notes, you know?") or how tired I was ("Wow, I need some caffeine-these are late nights...") although all of these quotes were actually spoken at some point in time, minus the Josh Bell one.  The atmosphere was just so familiar and comfortable.  It was cozy, warm and friendly, like being wrapped up in a blanket of slightly awkward complements mixed with the one-armed hugs and jaw kisses of non-friends who are truly happy to see you.  

I think the relationship between my description of these symphony rehearsals and my description of my feelings toward said rehearsals is, if you think about it, an accurate depiction of my personality and outlook in life.  I am social, I care about people more than experiences, I enjoy being surrounded by people regardless of their level of love for me or I for them, I like to laugh and joke and smile even if the topic of conversation is not particularly funny, I liked to be noticed, I enjoy hugging and kissing strangers, I rate how good or bad my day was on how many people I made laugh, I take pleasure in external validation, whether it be about my musicianship, appearance or intelligence, I would rather have a 30 second conversation about nothing than quietly stand in like for the toilet, and I would rather have a job where I am bombarded with kids and other teachers every second of the day than have a job practicing and performing on the most beautiful musical instrument in the world (don't even fight me on this one, you know it's true.)  It's never been a secret: I am a teacher first, cellist second.  I've always hated practicing- bleh!  Boring!  I'm all alone?  For more than an hour?  And I have to do the same thing over and over?  Gross.  You mean there is a career in which I can boss other people around and they have to do what I say?  Sign me up!  

That said, there could not be another group of people with which I have this awkward yet comfortable, unconditionally friendly yet non-friend relationship.  Is it the music that brings us together and forms that special bond or is the people that make the music so special in the first place?  I don't really know and I don't really care.  What I do know is this: in my opinion, the bonds formed while performing with an orchestra far outweigh the notes and rhythms- this I must remember when I teach.